My morning was started rudely today. Long story short, I still feel that I was screamed at ultimately because it affected the other person’s plan, which was fueled by his wrong motivations.
As I spent the next few moments dispelling my anger, I was a little shocked for my reasoning behind the thought “don’t worry, weren’t you always expecting something like this to happen anyway? This definitely isn’t the first time you’ve seen his short-tempered blows.”
I have had a lot of time spent with this person, and seeing he loses himself to anger quite often, I have often used this thought to calm myself down.
That’s not the shocking part. I’m sure everyone has that one or a few acquaintances with short fuses and have thoughts around the same lines.
It hit me this morning that it wasn’t very natural to always be prepared for an argument to happen around the same person, and recall a disclaimer message of expecting the person to blow up, everytime you spent time with the person. I realised that I would literally find myself thinking: alright, you chose to go out and have lunch together, so if whatever you do or say just happens to spark an argument instead of a discussion, or if he’s in a bad mood and decides to spill it onto you, you asked for it. And so giving birth to my initial “calming sentence” at the top of this post, albeit with a slightly skewed reasoning behind it.
Since when did I actually start finding this a normal process? How about all the other arguments he’s always sparked with others? Do those people have the same thoughts as well?
I’m done with my morning rant.